Are your shoes shined?

You only have 40 minutes to: summarize your entire academic career, explain all of your past experiences in a multi-S.T.A.R. format, demonstrate that you can log on to a website and regurgitate generalized information from said website, ask the proper questions to have a perception of interest, and listen carefully to information you will not remember the next day. At the same time, you must present yourself as a person that is willing to work with others, maintain eye contact even when it isn’t given back to you, and you must dress in attire that is befitting a “professional individual.” Finally, before you depart and thank an individual who is getting paid to talk to you, it is important to make sure that when your right hand touches the individual’s right hand, the encounter is of a firm variety. From that short encounter the course of your entire life can be determined; but what exactly are they looking for?

When it comes to the attire, doesn’t an interviewer realize that most people don’t dress like that every day? The interviewer should be reminded of this when he is wearing a polo shirt with his company’s logo, instead of wearing an item of clothing that can be used to asphyxiate an individual rather easily. I understand the concept that if you demonstrate effort to ensure that your physical appearance is undisheveled, you might demonstrate the same amount of effort in other aspects of your life. In turn, this would lead to the thought that you would be an advantageous addition to the company’s workforce. Though in reality, it just represents how much money you currently have at your disposal. Furthermore, it is a glorious way to be disingenuous, due the fact that a person can be wearing a three-piece Armani suit and look “more professional” than another person who has much higher credentials than a handmade Italian suit wearing person.

I have been told to ensure that I make a “good first impression” on any possible employer, yada yada yada. It has been drilled into our craniums how important these meetings are and how they have a lasting effect on the relationship between individuals. Though, how can a person that has a slight indication of cognitive ability actually put any credence into this line of reasoning? I can describe to you a plethora of individuals who turned out to not fit my first impression of them. For instance, too many times I have heard people say, “Well, when you get to know him...” I do not think it is physically possible to be able to judge a person’s ethos by a single meeting. Even if you do think that, you are simply resorting to stereotypes.

Naturally, an interviewer doesn’t have the luxury of having multiple meetings (they might have two) with a perspective employee, to truly understand a person’s character. An individual who normally is full of cynicism and apathy can present himself mirthfully and full of ambition (a real “go-getter”). Then, this individual, after receiving his employment, will slowly revert back to his normal self-deprecating state; but is that really a problem for the company? If that was a problem, then the interview process would be a much more rigorous venture. Something like only hiring someone after a successful completion of an internship or co-op for the same company he is applying to.

The hiring process isn’t that rigorous, and it must work out for the betterment of both parties involved the majority of the time. If that is the case, what is so special about the person that is being hired? Regardless of how they present themselves while being interviewed, they are going to behave differently once employed. I am sure that employers understand this fact, thus they will simply use a resume to decide who they are going to hire. Though, this can also artificially demonstrate certain attributes an individual doesn’t contain. Ergo, the two main devices for securing employment, the interview and resume, can be considered a farce to a cynical individual. That being the case, what other aspects do they utilize in determination of employment? I believe that would be the $64,000 dollar question, and I have less than a grand in my checking account.