2008 Olympics to include nerd run
Muckrake McBridgeburner / Hose Thron
Already around the world, nerds have begun practicing the nerd run wherever they can with the official training gear.
The International Olympic Committee announced Tuesday that the 2008 Beijing Olympics will include a new sport: Competitive Nerd Running.
The event will consist of foot racing 300 yards, or approximately the distance from the BSB Residence Hall basement to Moench Hall. Participants will be required to run using large strides with their arms fixed at their sides and with their heads pointed down at their feet. Each athlete will also be required to pull a wheelie backpack behind them for the duration of the race.
The event will be split into four divisions, three of which only differ by the weight of the wheelie backpack that must be pulled, while in the fourth the nerd runners will be encumbered by a large trenchcoat.
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