Chavez - the new favorite dictator?

About a month ago, Hugo Chavez won a great victory for himself. Not for the people, as he always claims to be representing, but for himself. He was able to have the National Assembly, composed of Chavez supporters, approve the changes to the Venezuelan Constitution to change 33 of the 350 articles of the Constitution. Is this alarming enough for anyone yet? I mean, aside from those people called political dissidents that oppose Chavez and end up in prison for it. They already know what is happening over there. But, in case you did not know…

First, Chavez has been buddying up to my favorite head of state, Russian President Vladimir Putin. Aside from buying billions of dollars of military weapons from good old Russia, he’s been stealing all the plays out of his playbook! Come on, we need some originality. First, he wants to reform the Constitution, allowing him to be ruler for life (Ok, so Putin has not gone that far yet, but there are rumors of him thinking about it. That, and his party would not mind seeing that happen). Yeah, it would be pretty easy to alter the Constitution, especially when all your supporters run the National Assembly, but you control the ballot boxes when elections come around. And then to jail your opponents? Well, true, he has not yet poisoned them with polonium-210, but, Putin has not officially yet done that either.

Next, he’s been nationalizing all of the major industries in Venezuela. Come on, is this really what we get to expect from 21st Century Socialism? It honestly sounds like the old 20th Century Socialism. There is only so much nationalizing of oil, telecommunications, and electricity sectors that any one dictator can do. Although, now Chavez wants to nationalize the Central Bank in Venezuela, which would give him access to billions of dollars of foreign reserves. A good thing, especially considering how it helps his image of robbing the rich to pay for the poor and their social services, which helps Chavez stay in power.

Then, there is also the America-baiting. Sure, it has happened constantly since 1945, but really, does Chavez think the USA is going to invade his country? Why is it that whenever a socialist dictator takes power, automatically the capitalist fat-cats in America want to invade that nation? Does our nation no longer have a purpose, but to invade small socialist countries?

Also, apparently dictators-for-life are now immortal, especially those of the socialist persuasion. After having shouted “Long live Fidel” to a crowd of his supporters, Chavez said, “For those who want Fidel to die, they are going to end up frustrated because Fidel Castro will never die. He will always live on.” Has he discovered the Fountain of Youth? Or, is this a new part of the 21st Century Socialism plan?

So, Chavez is all for the people. Everything is for the people, and the people have the power. It is amazing then, that he has come under fire from the Roman Catholic Bishops’ Conference, because all of his proposals are drafted behind closed doors and do not involve the people. Kind of interesting, assuming he keeps stating “It’s the power of the people.”

Well, you know what, if Chavez really wants to be a wannabe-dictator, he should start taking cues from Russian President Vladimir Putin, and start posing shirtless, like in the accompanied picture, or he could start blowing raspberries on little boys’ stomachs when he’s walking down the street. He would have my vote, I guarantee it. Not that it would really matter at that point anymore…