ME department renamed “Department of Risky Business”

In a surprise move, the Mechanical Engineering Department at Hose-Rulman has traded its historically conservative and low-key demeanor for a brand new image - Institute Bad Boy. Professor Pavid “Kegmeister” Durdy, head of the newly disorganized department, made the announcement last Wednesday at the administrative council, after which he waved his fist in the air and yelled “Bad ass!” several times.

Professor Garrell “Shades” Dibson has embraced the new lack of vision, vowing to convert his beige Mercedes into a float to ruin Homecoming. “This could be a great senior design project,” said Shades. “Too bad I’m going to do it instead. Now, I need to go buy a 55 gallon drum of marbles and some smoke grenades.”

A faculty search committee consisting of Professors Cil “Mac Daddy” Phornwell, Batsy “Toots” Prackin, and Mames “TopGun” Jayhew has been formed to recruit someone specifically named Drunky McFightsalot. “With a name like that, he could be a real utility player,” explained TopGun.

Dean Wart “Futzles” Estern informed the Thron that the Department of Risky Business was on “double secret probation”: one more mistake and they would be in serious trouble. A large water balloon then flew in through the window, soaking his pants as well as a stack of important documents. Professor Ron “The Don” Dichards is suspected of throwing the balloon.

How did the Department of Risky Business find themselves on probation? Stated Professor Ferry “Underpants” Jine, “That’s what happens when you party naked.”