Wacky Prof Quotes

“It seems like an anal German thing to do, you know, to just order everything.”

-- Prof. Wollowski, being continental



“I’m a file, give me a block!”

-- Prof. Mellor, being weird



“Iran is hosting a convention to discuss the viability of the Holocaust, which is good, because I was getting confused by all the, you know, evidence.”

-- Prof. Casey, nitpicking



“There were many erections, I mean, haha, insurrections.”

-- Prof. Michel, quoting the text liberally



“So sad, too bad, you’re screwed.”

-- Prof. Mellor



“You guys understand this bull ---- better than I do.”

-- Prof. Bremmer, admitting faults



“We’re going to do that, well, not make meth…”

-- Prof. Wollowski, taking a byte out of crime



“You’ll wish you had let the squirrels die.”

-- Prof. Mueller, walking with the planet



“My new girlfriend is just like the square root of -2: irrational and imaginary.”

-- Prof. Voltmer, a lucky man



“It’s ‘big f-ing gun.’ So now we’re all culturally on the same page.”

-- Prof. Clifton, knowing what really matters



“Ok, I’m trying to remember who was killing who today. This is hard.”

-- Prof. Casey, on the Israel/Palestine conflict